Honestly I always thought those celebrity money advice articles were just fluff, you know? But curiosity got the best of me, so I grabbed my notebook one Tuesday morning and decided to crack open Drake’s supposed ‘billionaire habits.’ Spoiler: still broke, but maybe learned a thing or two.
The Great Expense Tracking Disaster
First step everyone pushes: track every penny. Drake probably has a team for that, but I dug out a crusty old receipt pad from my junk drawer. Tried logging my Dunkin’ run. Felt ridiculous scratching down “$4.75 large black coffee” while holding up the line. Made it maybe three entries before I gave up. Switched to trying a free app – tapped in two days worth of spending before forgetting it existed. Classic. Expense tracking? More like mental tracking chaos.
The Big Pivot: Paying “Future Me”
Saw this thing about Drake “paying himself first.” Sounded smart. Figured even I could try that. Set up a stupidly small automatic transfer – we’re talking coffee money small – from my checking to my sad, neglected savings account on payday. Here’s the shocker: It actually happened. Didn’t even feel the pinch. Two weeks later, logged into my bank (usually a horror show) and saw that little pot of cash quietly sitting there. Felt like magic even though it was like $20.
Squinting at Long-Term Stuff (Wayyyy Out There)
Drake thinks long-term, they say. Okay, sure. I opened the dusty “Documents” folder on my laptop. Found an old retirement statement I usually pretend doesn’t exist. The numbers looked…tiny. Like, alarmingly tiny for a “long-term” thing. Didn’t understand half the jargon, but I increased my contribution rate by 1%. Just 1%! Barely touches my paycheck, but future me might finally buy something nicer than instant noodles in 40 years.
So yeah, his billionaire status ain’t rubbing off on me anytime soon. But picking just one stupidly simple thing actually worked?
- Forget tracking pennies. Stressful.
- Forget complex investments. Confusing.
- Focus on THIS: Set up an auto-transfer. Today. Even $5. Do it before spending anything. Future You exists, and apparently likes having snacks.
End of experiment. Still eating ramen. But hey, at least Future Me got a few extra bucks he didn’t have yesterday.
