Alright honey, let’s dive straight into today’s mess. So here I am, staring at my tired eyes this morning, thinking, “Girl, we need a miracle that won’t break the bank.” Time to test some cheap stuff everyone raves about.
The Morning Disaster Unfolds
Poured my coffee first thing – obviously – and hauled out every ‘affordable brand’ eye product I own. Started with the eyeshadow primer. Grabbed that popular $3 tube everyone swears by. Squirted it… way too much. Ended up with a weird white patch. Panicked a bit, just smeared it with my finger – no fancy brushes today, this is real life. Felt tacky… fingers crossed it actually holds.
Next up: Eyeshadow. Dug into a neutral palette from the drugstore. Heard it’s “buttery.” Pressed my brush in… puff of powder flew everywhere. Sneezed glitter dust. Lovely. Packed some light brown onto my lid – took ages to build color. Blended it like crazy with a fluffy brush. Kept blending… still blending… feels like forever. Got a lighter shade, patted it near the brow bone. Barely showed up. Okay, kinda frustrated now. Thought, “Screw it, grab the darker shade for the crease.” Went in gentle – still looked muddy. Ended up adding a fingertip of shimmer shade from a different brand over it.
Eyeliner Adventure (More Like Horror)
Switched gears to eyeliner. Picked up a drugstore pencil everyone loves for waterlines. Sharpened it till it was pointy. Leaned into my mirror… pressed carefully. It dragged! Like scratching sandpaper on my waterline. Eyes watered immediately. Tried again… smeared gray sludge instead of a neat line. Wiped it off with a wet tissue and muttered, “Nope.” Grabbed my trusty liquid liner from a mid-range brand I like better.
Mascara Roulette
Finally, mascara. Pulled out two contenders. Opened the first one – giant goop on the wand! Scraped most off on the tube. Applied a coat. Okay, definition’s alright… lashes felt sticky though. Waited 20 minutes… looked down at my shirt. Found a tiny smudge. Damn. Pulled out the second tube. Wand pulled out clean! Gently brushed it through my lashes. Noticeable length and volume without clumps. Actually smiled! A definite keeper.
The Verdict After a Long Day
Checked the mirror constantly. The eyeshadow? Creased a little by lunch, not terrible. That primer held okay! Eyeliner wings? Still sharp, praise the lord. Mascara? A few tiny flakes on my cheek later in the day. But overall? Honestly shocked! Most of it stuck around.
So what actually worked for my 40+ lids?
- Primer: That super cheap one? Shockingly decent!
- Eyeshadow: Mixed brands. Need a better cheap palette. Disappointed.
- Liquid Eyeliner: Skip the cheap pencil, period. Worth $10 more.
- Mascara: Found one awesome tube! A true diamond in the rough!
End of the day? I’m broke af, but happy. Found a few hidden gems. Proves you don’t need gold-plated brushes for your eyes to look alive! Now where’s my wine?
