So last weekend my buddy threw a surprise costume party with only 48 hours notice. Crap. I panicked because decent costumes cost serious cash. Then it hit me – Adam Sandler! That dude basically wears pajamas in public. Perfect lazy cosplay material.
The Raid Begins
I tore through my closet like a raccoon in trash cans. Pulled out:
- My dad’s oversized Hawaiian shirt that looks like a toddler vomited rainbows
- Basketball shorts with peeling elastic
- Worn-out New Balances missing the left shoe’s logo
Bonus find: gym socks with one heel completely worn through. Score! Sandler would approve.
Operation Bedhead
This was trickiest part. My hair’s usually neat so I drowned it in cheap hairspray then rubbed a frizzy towel all over. When that looked too intentional, I sprayed water and slept with it mashed against a pillow. Woke up looking like electrocuted poodle. Perfect.
Final Assembly Line
Shoes on with NO socks pulled up? Check. Shirt half-buttoned showing gross undershirt? Check. Messy hair? Double check. Needed the signature prop so I grabbed my coffee mug and scribbled “GROWN UPS 3 SCRIPT” with dry-erase marker. Almost too authentic.
Took more photos at that party than my wedding day. Dude recognized me from twenty feet yelling “HEY SANDLER’S DRUNK UNCLE!” Spent zero bucks and maybe seven minutes prepping. Moral of the story? Laziness pays off when cosplaying Hollywood’s king of slobs.
